A Trick or Treater's Tale
by valleyforge
Summary: The Farscape kids go trick or treating. If you can't take a joke, don't read it!


This is something I did just for fun a couple of years ago. It was written for the Cohorts, so some of it may not make sense to everyone. Here's the part where I normally thank my beta, SciFiChick, but I think for some reason this went unbeta'd. Bwahahaha....   
  
A Trick or Treater's Tale  
  
"Make sure you stay together," Bialar's mother called after the children. "And make sure you watch your little brother."  
  
"Yes, Mother," Bialar said, taking Tauvo by the hand.  
  
""Hey...that's a neat orange costume," Bialar said to Johnny. "What are you supposed to be? A pumpkin?"  
  
"No...I'm an astronaut."  
  
"Oooh."  
  
Johnny looked curiously at Bialar's long black coat. "Who are you supposed to be? Johnny Cash?"  
  
"Ha ha," laughed Bialar. "I'm a superhero."  
  
"Guess what I am," said Tauvo, all excited.  
  
"You look like death warmed over," said little Aeryn.  
  
Tauvo beamed with pride. "That's right! I'm a ghost."  
  
"I'm a printheth," said Aeryn.  
  
The four children ran laughing to the first house and knocked. "Trick or treat!" they all shouted as a guy dressed up as a doofus answered the door. He scratched his head and then his behind. "How many?"  
  
"Four!" the children replied in unison.  
  
He took four VHS tapes from a bowl, counting aloud as he dropped them into the plastic pumpkins. "Uno...dos...tres...quatro..."  
  
The children stared into the pumpkins and then at each other. "Thank you," they all said and ran down the driveway. They ducked behind the hedge, where Bialar quickly dumped the tape from his pumpkin.   
  
"What is it?" Aeryn asked.  
  
Johnny pointed at the label. "It says *JQ*."  
  
"Don't touch it," Bialar cautioned. He took Tauvo's pumpkin and dumped the tape onto the ground. Aeryn and Johnny dumped theirs too.  
  
Bialar gripped Tauvo's hand and set out for the next house, with Johnny and Aeryn close behind. It was kind of a dumpy looking place, but the porch light was on, so they knocked. The man who answered wore a bum's costume...ratty clothing and several days' stubble. He stuck a big bowl of folded papers in front of them.  
  
"Just one apiece," he grumbled as each child reached into the bowl and took a slip of paper.  
  
"What is it?" Aeryn asked excitedly once they had reached the sidewalk. "A coupon for McDonalds or Burger King?"  
  
Bialar and Johnny examined their papers carefully front and back, and then Bialar looked at Tauvo's. "All they say is SAVE FARSCAPE." He opened the mailbox at the end of the man's driveway and tossed the papers inside, as did Johnny and Aeryn.  
  
"Remember not to go to this house next year," Johnny muttered.  
  
Bialar nodded and committed the name on the mailbox to memory: THE KEMPERS  
  
"Let's go the SciFiChick's house next," said Aeryn. "She always has something good!"  
  
"Yeah!!"  
  
Mrs. SciFiChick answered the door dressed in her Cohort's costume. Bialar quickly covered Tauvo's eyes. "Oh my goodness!" she exclaimed. "It's so good to see you!"  
  
"Trick or treat!" they shouted, holding out their plastic pumpkins.  
  
"Well...I just have the most wonderful treat for you. Homemade navy bean soup to warm you all up." Mrs. SciFiChick ladled some piping hot soup into each child's pumpkin as they watched, mouths agape. "And here's a plastic spoon for each of you."  
  
"Gee...thanks, Mrs. SciFiChick," said Bialar, staring into his pumpkin.  
  
"Yeah...ah, thanks," Johnny and Aeryn added.  
  
"What'd we get?" asked Tauvo.  
  
They sat on the curb outside the SciFiChick's house to eat the soup, which was very, very good. Next, they went to Missy's, Bucky's and even cousin Nick's. By the time they reached the last house on the block their plastic pumpkins were heaped with chocolate.  
  
"Hello children!" a man wearing a bright, orange, flowered shirt exclaimed happily. "What have we here?"  
  
"I'm a ghost," shouted Tauvo.  
  
"And I'm an astronaut," yelled Johnny.  
  
Aeryn giggled and covered her mouth. "I'm a printheth."  
  
"I'm a superhero," Bialar stated, hands on hips, shoulders back.  
  
"What are you," Tauvo asked, pointing at the man's shirt. "A clown?"  
  
The man laughed robustly and dropped a bottle into each pumpkin.  
  
They thanked him and headed for home.  
  
  
  
"That was fun!" Johnny said, flopping on his back into a big pile of leaves. Bialar and Tauvo did the same. Soon the boys began to wrestle, laughing and throwing leaves.  
  
"What's in the bottles?" Aeryn asked as she sat down cross-legged.  
  
"It's soda pop," announced Tauvo.  
  
Bialar stopped playing long enough to examine the label. "It's something new," he said, spelling it out. "S M I R N O F F..."   
  
HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!! 


End file.
